I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
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