You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
