god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
