HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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