She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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