Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize