our cab driver is having phone sex.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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