I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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