just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
