i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
