If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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