Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
This is the high leading the old right now
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
