Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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