Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
