Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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