now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
We need a shit load of segways right now
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
