Old men and throwing up are my life now.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize