Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I need to stop coming to work sober
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
