Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
you told grandpa to call you daddy
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
