put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
