I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
