So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
