Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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