"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
