That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
