I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
