it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Randomize