Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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