im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
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you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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