sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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