I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
is wine microwaveable?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize