we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize