Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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