You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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