He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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