Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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