He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Are we still banned from the library?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
