lets start a swedish sibling band together
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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