Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
