Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
