She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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