i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
