I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
