.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize
