He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
