At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
