so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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