If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize