he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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