Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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