I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
